Sobering Science

Things are starting to get confusing.

On Monday, I boldly declared beer to be "brain food." Now, a new study from the Czech Republic dares to suggest the opposite.

According to Dr. Thomas Grim (an appropriate name for the bearer of such bleak news) of Palacky University, the amount of beer a scientist consumes is inversely proportional to the likelihood that he or she gets a paper published or has a paper cited by other researchers. In other words: drink, and watch your CV go down the crapper.

It appears this phenomenon is not limited to just the heaviest-drinking members to the scientific community; rather, the relationship holds across the board.

I should note here that the Czech Republic leads the world in per capita beer consumption. I'm not sure what, if any, implication that has for the present study, except that perhaps the curve which describes moderate to heavy drinkers is steeper there than elsewhere. Just a WAG.

Sodden scientists take heed: consider zymurgy.